Espousing Compassion Vs. Embodying Compassion - Daniel Goleman

Excerpt from: Altered Traits: Science Reveals How Meditation Changes Your Mind, Brain, and Body, 2017.

In arid landscapes in ancient times, grapes were rare, a succulent delicacy grown in distant regions. Yet one day, records from the second century AD tell us, someone brought such a treat all the way to the desert abode of Macarius, a Christian hermit. 

But Macarius did not eat the grapes; instead he gave them to another hermit nearby who was feeble and who seemed in greater need of the treat.

And that hermit, though grateful for Macarius’s kindness, thought of yet another among them who would benefit from eating the grapes, and passed them on to that monk. So it went through the entire hermit community until the grapes came around again to Macarius.

Those early Christian hermits, known as Desert Fathers, lauded the same wholesome modes of being as do yogis in the Himalayas today, who follow surprisingly similar discipline, customs, and meditative practices. They share an ethic of selflessness and generosity and live in isolation, the better to immerse themselves in meditation.

What propelled those juicy grapes’ journey through that desert commune? The drivers were compassion and loving-kindness, the attitude of putting the needs of others ahead of our own.

Technically, “loving-kindness” refers to wishing that other people be happy; its near cousin “compassion” entails the wish that people be relieved of suffering. Both outlooks (which we’ll refer to as “compassion”) can be strengthened through mind training – and if successful, the result will be acting to help others, as demonstrated by the Desert Fathers and that bunch of grapes.

But consider a modern update. Divinity students at a theological seminary were told they would be evaluated on a practice sermon. Half were given a random selection of Bible topics for their sermon. The other half were assigned the parable of the Good Samaritan, the man who stopped to help a stranger in need who was lying by the side of the road, even as others walked by, indifferent.

After a time to prepare their thoughts, they went one by one to another building, where they were evaluated on the talk they had just prepared. As each of them in turn  passed through a courtyard on the way to give their sermon, they passed a man who was bent over and moaning in pain.

The question: Did they stop to help the stranger in need?

Turns out whether a divinity student helped or not depended on how late that student felt -- the more time-pressured, the less likely to stop. When we are rushing through a busy day, worried about getting to the next place on time, we tend literally not to notice the people around us, let alone their needs.

There’s a spectrum that runs from self-centered preoccupations (I’m late!), to noticing the people around us, to tuning in to them, empathizing, and finally, if they are in need, acting  to help.

Holding the attitude of compassion means we merely espouse this virtue, embodying compassion means we act. The students pondering the Good Samaritan likely were appreciating his compassion -- but were not more likely to act with compassion themselves.

Several meditation methods aim to cultivate compassion. The scientific (and ethical) question is, Does this matter -- does it move people toward compassionate action?

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John M. Darley and C. Daniel Batson, "From Jerusalem to Jericho": A study of situational and dispositional variables in helping behavior. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 27(1), (1973). 100–108.

[Daniel Goleman & Richard J. Davidson, Altered Traits: Science Reveals How Meditation Changes Your Mind, Brain, and Body, Sep. 5, 2017, ‎Avery, pp.101-121]

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